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Mommy, What’s ‘Gay’? Oh boy…

Yesterday, when college football player Michael Sam went public with his sexuality (and honestly, I hate that…straight people don’t have to announce they are straight, right?), it was a big news topic. Without getting into the story itself, on why he did it now, the timing, etc, I want to talk about the blip in the radar it had for my kids.

My 7 year old was reading the headline on the screen, which said something to the effect of ‘Football player Michael Sam comes out as a gay man’. He read the line, and turns to me and says, “Mommy, what’s ‘gay’?”

I froze for a second, but not because I didn’t want to have the conversation. On the contrary, I was glad he asked. His 5 year old brother was right there, so they both patiently waited for me to answer, with inquisitive looks on their faces.

We believe in answering our kids with real answers, not just deflecting ones, because the more knowledge (factual knowledge) they have early on, the better off they will be later in life (in our opinions). First I tried bringing up the people we know that are gay. We have a female cousin that is married to a wonderful girl, my husband’s brother has a brother-in-law that has had the same boyfriend for some time now. Our boys are very familiar with them, though it never really registered that they were ‘different’ than other relationships (in the eyes of the public, anyway). Our next-door neighbor is also a lesbian.

They weren’t really ‘getting it’, so instead, I did some comparisons. I said you know how Mommy is a girl, Daddy is a boy, we love each other and are married? They nodded yes. So I said, ok, well if Mommy was gay, then I would love a woman and marry a woman, and if Daddy was gay then he would love a man and marry a man. I asked if they understood that information.

They both contemplated for a couple seconds (I could see the wheels working, likely imagining each of us in that scenario), and then simply said, “Ok!”, and then went on to ask me the next question on a completely different topic.

They had no qualms. No concerns. No issues with it. They just knew that people loved people, and men can love men, and women can love women in the same way that Mommy and Daddy love each other.

So simple. So basic.

It provided a little surge of pride for me, knowing that we are raising the boys to be tolerant, non-judgmental, and caring human beings. Can’t lie…we’re a bit awesome.

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It’s Sexy and You Know It

I hear a lot of talk about new ‘biz ops’ that are ‘sexy’, therefore more appealing to the younger crowd of entrepreneurs all over the world. You know what is sexy? No limitations. Watch this and find out what I mean.

 

Happy Name Day to Me! Well, Yesterday.

1/2/14 Vlog–Snow, Snow, Snow

So I mentioned that I may do some video blogging (vlog) this year…here you go. Nothing terribly interesting, unless you’re fascinated with snow, or have never had to take an hour to drive 18 miles before.

Also, the snow we got for 2.5 days? Yeah, it now has a name since it moved out east (Hercules…seriously), because that’s how the East coast does it…sissies. IT’S JUST A SNOW STORM.

So I Saw ‘Saving Mr. Banks’

And I liked it.

But I do have to quantify my definition of ‘like’.

My dear husband accompanied me to see it, just to humor me. We had no idea what it was really about, just that it involved Tom Hanks as Walt Disney, and something about Mary Poppins.

I love Mary Poppins.

What we discovered was that it was not really about Mary Poppins, but rather about the author of the Mary Poppins stories, and her childhood struggles that led to her writings.

My husband was bored. He claims he ‘liked it’, and wasn’t bored, but he lies. He was utterly bored. I give him props for not pulling out his phone and playing Candy Crush.

Why did I like it? Because I love learning about backstories and WHY things are they way they are. I’ve never read the Mary Poppins books, but I do love the movie (spoiler alert—much of the movie is NOT like the books). It was slower-moving, and much more thought-provoking than the general public can handle. It was Oscar-caliber, and I have seen chatter of just that.

In the interest of full disclosure, I rarely ever see Oscar-nominated films. They bore me. Usually because the topics are not things I’m interested in. But Disney? Mary Poppins? I was drawn in, hook, line, and sinker.

Short story long, I truly did enjoy the movie, though I would have to consider the person I’m talking to if they asked me if they should see it. The commercials are a bit misleading…there isn’t a lot of actual Disney in it, but a lot of Walt, a little sadness, several fantastic lessons, and is definitely worth the time if you enjoy learning about how things come into existence.

That reminds me, I better start looking this instant if I’m to be Mary Poppins for Halloween this year. So many smart outfits to choose from, but destined to be quite the project.

Happy 2014 to you all, and cheers to a great start!

(PS, my birthday is in a week. Y’know…as a side note.)

Adios, 2013. You’ve Been…Unimpressive.

You may have noticed my absence for quote a few weeks. Whoops. Holidays take a lot of my attention, and we’ve been so dang busy living, I forgot to describe that living for my couple of readers. Good thing Santa has already come and gone, or I’d have coal in my stocking!

Seeing as there are only 4 hours left in 2013, it’s inevitable that a little look backward at the year is coming. Do you do that? Take inventory of your year, decide what to change, fix, start, stop, etc? Obviously, I do.

I will say that initially, 2013 for me was a frustrating year. I don’t want to call is disappointing, because there is never disappointment when personal growth and good health are present. However, frustration can exist in this situation.

I’m frustrated with my progress on existing goals. I know that this is purely my own fault, and I recognize my lack of effort for too much of the year. So, in essence, I’m frustrated with myself. Business-wise, I had a plateau to stand on. Perhaps even some downhill action, if I look too closely. But what that means is that I was able to learn what NOT to do, and how NOT to conduct business for the future. Definite learning experience, which means it was not a complete loss.

I’m frustrated at the fact that I seem to not have as strong of friendship ties as I thought. I’m a person that will do anything for a friend in need, and loyalty is a big deal for me. What I learned in 2013 is that not all of my friends feel the same way in return. Disappointing, yes, but it has taught me that I just need to create new relationships, and make it a point to strengthen ones that are existing and worthy. I’ve decided to get myself a stationery set, and start writing letters again. I love technology and the quick connection of emails, texts, facebook walls and tweets, but I sincerely miss just talking to people, and hearing their voices, or reading their hand-written words. #oldschool

The more I think about it, the more it becomes clear that I can’t afford to not make 2014 a stellar year. I have no choice. If I don’t, then three hundred and sixty-five days from now, I’ll be no better off, and lamenting the same things. The pain of staying the same must be strong for me in order to make a change.

I’m feeling that pain. So much more than in the past. I can’t abide with being comfortably miserable, or just surviving instead of living. It just doesn’t work for me.

Random thought, but I think I may work on doing a video journal/blog as often as possible. Sometimes, I can get a point across better when I speak it, rather than typing.

Facing My Fears, and Possibly Facing Yours, Too

(Warning: sensitive topic to follow. Please do not read if you cannot handle talk of death)

So I have a fear.

I have a fear of death.

Not the normal fear of dying, itself, but rather death and what it does to those you leave behind.

I have a distinct and paralyzing fear of attending wakes. I just can’t do it. I figured out why only recently, though.

I’m afraid of how they make me look at the future, how I imagine myself in that position.

It makes me take a look at my current situation, and what the repercussions would be if I were to not make it past tomorrow. Would I be leaving my family in a good place? Could they be taken care of, bills be paid, finances not a burden?

What about those whose lives I’ve touched? Are there enough positive ripples? Did I truly make the most of my time here? Did I help enough people so that it would be apparent in the attendance of my service?

Nobody wants to consider their own passing, nor that of anyone they know.  But I’ve seen it too often, recently. It makes me feel that I haven’t done enough, yet. I haven’t put my family in the best position possible. I haven’t created something for them that will last. I haven’t helped nearly enough people, and I haven’t been insistent enough with people that I know could benefit. I haven’t formed a legacy.

I hope this makes you think a little about your own life, and what your answers to my personal questions might be for yourself. I feel like I owe myself and my family more than what I have given already. We need and deserve more. What about you? Wouldn’t you agree that you owe it to yourself and your loved ones to make an honest attempt at bringing more to the table? Look at the next five years of your future. Do you see your situation improving if you change nothing? Look at the past five years. Are you in a better position now than you were back then? Have you tried to change it, and failed? How can you change your next five?

In my opinion, the Rolling Stones had it wrong. Time is not on our side. Time keeps moving, whether we are here or not. It is up to us to make the most of the time we are given, and since we never know when that may run out, we cannot waste a single minute of it.

The final decision is up to you, though. Will you do nothing, and change nothing, accepting whatever you are handed? Or will you take a step to get back in control of your future? I took the step, and though it is off the beaten path, it is by far the most sure-footed step I’ve ever made in my life. I’ve acknowledged my fear, and accepted the challenge of breaking it down. I hope to help others do the same, but it can only be done if you wish it so.

What’s your fear? Or better, what’s your hope for your future? What are your goals? I love to hear what others dream about, because it reminds me that there is still hope in the world, waiting for someone to help it grow.