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Special Delivery! Two Weeks of Food, Reviewed


So I am what you might call a ‘serial dieter’.  Over the years, I’ve tried many different diets and meal plans, hoping to find something that works. I’ve never needed to lose a ton of weight, there is just always that bit of excess that most of us have, especially after having kids.

I’ve done:

  • Jenny Craig
  • Weight Watchers (twice)
  • Nutrisystem
  • Counting calories
  • Slim fast
  • Heart patient prior to surgery diet
  • Hollywood juice diet
  • …and been tempted to try many others

Most of those worked to a point, and Weight Watchers was probably the most successful (lost 20 pounds each time), but when you stop counting points, the weight creeps back on.

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Why Does Eating Healthy Have to be So Involved

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Back to this fitness challenge thing…part of it is a meal program. The first 6 weeks, I’m supposed to cut out grains and starches. This is not a great idea. I looked at a list of grains and starches…WHO KNEW THAT CORN WAS A STARCH?? That is one of like only 9 vegetables I eat (though I am broadening my horizons…that number used to be more like 5).

So I go crying to my sister and a friend about how obscenely difficult this first 6 weeks will be if I have to cut all this out of my diet. Like, literally 75% of my diet are these things. I will admit that I will probably drop weight like slicing off butter if I cut it all out, but DAMN, I don’t want to starve! There is only so much cucumber in balsamic and dipped in hummus that a girl can take! Yes, add protein, but I like my eggs WITH their yolks (egg whites are like air to me), and I’m not big on fish…ok, I don’t like fish at all. I may have to use the trick we taught Ryan (first son), and hold my nose while eating it. It’s a texture thing, though. Hm. #obstacle

Sister’s response is to at least go gluten-free (friend agrees). Ok, fine. I can avoid wheat in the ingredients. However. That is WAY too much thinking for me. I’m not affected by gluten normally, so it isn’t something I really care about. I really think this will work best if someone just writes out my meals for the next 6 weeks, citing exactly what I can eat (not what I can’t), and I will go to the store each week and faithfully stick to those, and those only. I’m a details girl, that follows instructions to a T (I’m suddenly wondering where that expression comes from), so if you give me a list, I will keep to it. MAKE THIS HAPPEN.

Getting Healthy and Fit for $50k? Heck yes.

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I’m sitting her watching the Blackhawks play the Avalanche (first thing to know about me is that I’m a big sports fan. Mainly Chicago sports only. Okay, the Blackhawks (hockey), Bulls (basketball), Bears (football), and Cubs (baseball). Don’t care much about the rest.), and thinking about how I really should be doing my exercises.

You see, I’ve started a fitness challenge. It runs 12 weeks, and this is the first full week. I’m easing into it, first with the altering of eating habits. The first 6 weeks, I can’t eat starches or grains. If you know me, you know that this is a gigantic sacrifice. Huge. I subsist on pasta, bread, and potatoes. I’m going to have to distract myself with peanut butter, pickles, and lots of sauteed zucchini and squash.

But really, it is for $50,000. Fifty large. Holy crap. I think that is a little motivation. It isn’t even about actual weight lost, but about transformation. Before and after pictures. I’ve got a lot of transforming to do, and it will be obvious. I’ll share those shots here when all is said and done. I won’t mind showing the fatness when it is no longer an issue.

Now that you mention it, I probably should go do my workout. At least I can watch the Hawks game while I do it.

Scarecrow Parties Topped with Dulce de Leche

I love to bake. Mainly cupcakes. There is something about finding that perfect recipe that rises just right, and the frosting that isn’t too sweet.

I haven’t had much time to do it lately (lately being the last 6 months–oops), but for tomorrow I promised some for the neighbor’s Scarecrow party thing they throw for the block. Last year, I think I did Rolo cupcakes and churro ones, or something in that vein. So, I just spent 30 minutes trying to find a new recipe. I rarely duplicate a recipe, unless it is a real fave in my house. I like trying all new ones.

I’ve always wanted to try my hand at making my own dulce de leche (caramel-ish sauce), and that was one of the first things that the google search produced, so I decided to give it a whirl.

Tomorrow, I shall be concocting a dulce de leche cupcake with dulce de leche Swiss meringue buttercream. My husband will say it is too much work, and will remind me of such while I am creating them, but when he eats one, he’ll forget all about how much work it was (for me, mind you…he doesn’t help).

I love baking because it is a perfectly measured process, one which can give a great result if you do it right (I rarely don’t–but there was that one time…). It makes me feel good to have someone try what I made and them call me an asshole because they then want more and are on a diet. I think the first time this particular neighbor tried one of my cupcakes (lemon with raspberry frosting), his exact word was ‘Bitch’ across the fence, as he stuffed his face full of more cake.

Ah, appreciation.